So, Your Childhood Friend Just Got Married, and You Haven’t Even Finished Your Bat Mitzvah Thank You Notes. What Now?

Listen, being in your early 20s is weird for everyone. Some people are young adults, and some people are older children. So even if your best friend from childhood is posting wedding pictures on Facebook, it doesn’t mean you should be embarrassed about how you’re still wearing clothes with your name on the inside label from when you went to summer camp in middle school.

It’s important to remember that you’re still the same age as your childhood friend, and you still share all of those cherished old memories. She still cares about you, and I’m sure she doesn’t think any less of you just because she has her own house now with her new husband and you’re sitting in your parents’ house surrounded by the photo booth picture strips you hung on the wall during peak bar mitzvah years and never took down, even once you grew your hair out and got your braces off.

You have no reason to be ashamed of where you’re at in life. You’re taking your time and doing what’s best for you, so why does it matter that she’s already pregnant and you still have your mom buy your tampons and come with you to the doctor?

Maybe you want to think about the future. Are you ready to get married? If so, you’ll surely find your person in no time! But if you look around your childhood bedroom at the clothes on the floor and the tzedakah boxes you got when you were 12 that you still haven’t written thank you notes for and you think “Hell no, I am not ready to be married,” then that’s alright too. You’re still young. You have time to finish those. 

So even if your parents and grandparents constantly remind you that when they were your age they were married homeowners, and the friend you used to play House with who always wanted to be Baby Sister is now an actual mother, you should feel no shame in slipping on the fuzzy socks you’ve had since you were 14, putting up your hair in a scrunchie older than that, and getting back into your loft bed to re-read Harry Potter.

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