Kindergarten Class Shaken By Sudden Divorce Of Shabbos Ema and Abba

CHERRY HILL, NJ — Shock swept through the Tadpoles class at Beis Chana Mushke Preschool this Tuesday morning when 5-year-olds Ari Schauer and Esther Blumenthal, last week’s Shabbos Ema and Abba, announced that they had begun legal proceedings to divorce. Witnesses recall noticing the apparent bliss in their relationship last Friday during the end-of-school Oneg.Continue reading “Kindergarten Class Shaken By Sudden Divorce Of Shabbos Ema and Abba”

So, Your Childhood Friend Just Got Married, and You Haven’t Even Finished Your Bat Mitzvah Thank You Notes. What Now?

Listen, being in your early 20s is weird for everyone. Some people are young adults, and some people are older children. So even if your best friend from childhood is posting wedding pictures on Facebook, it doesn’t mean you should be embarrassed about how you’re still wearing clothes with your name on the inside labelContinue reading “So, Your Childhood Friend Just Got Married, and You Haven’t Even Finished Your Bat Mitzvah Thank You Notes. What Now?”

Form Letter to Your Celebrity Crush About Why You are Worth Converting to Judaism for

Dear ___(Name of Celebrity Crush)__, My name is __(your name)__ and I have been in love with you for __(length of crush)__ since I saw you in __(movie, concert, TV show, interview, etc.)__.  I know we’ve never met, and I’m sure you have tons of people like me sending you fan mail. But this isContinue reading “Form Letter to Your Celebrity Crush About Why You are Worth Converting to Judaism for”