ITHACA, NY — On Wednesday, Noah Trasser of Dallas, TX, a Senior at the Cornell school of philosophy, turned in his thesis and announced that he has made definitive plans for after graduation. Trasser intends to emotionally prepare for being a 40 year old man playing basketball in the local JCC. “I was offered aContinue reading “College Senior Announces Plans to Become 40 Year Old Man Playing Basketball at the JCC After Graduation”
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Bear Attack Ruins High School Shabbaton; Lots of Students in Woods for Some Reason
CHICAGO, IL — A high school shabbaton was tragically cut short this weekend, thanks to a bear rampaging through the woods surrounding the summer camp where the shabbaton was held. Several students that were in the woods had to be rushed to the hospital, somehow oblivious to warning sounds of an incoming bear. “We actuallyContinue reading “Bear Attack Ruins High School Shabbaton; Lots of Students in Woods for Some Reason”
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