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Report: Everyone Really Just Guessing At Hebrew Bananagrams

JCC Man Starting to Think 6’10” Muscle-Bound Black Dude Playing Basketball Not Actually Jewish

TENAFLY, NJ — After losing his third straight pickup basketball game at the Bergen County Jewish Community Center by double figures, web developer Micah Barnett found himself wondering if his opponent – a six-foot-ten, 250-lb muscular black man – was indeed Jewish. “Say what you will,” said Barnett, high school color war T-Shirt drenched withContinue reading “JCC Man Starting to Think 6’10” Muscle-Bound Black Dude Playing Basketball Not Actually Jewish”

College Senior Announces Plans to Become 40 Year Old Man Playing Basketball at the JCC After Graduation

ITHACA, NY — On Wednesday, Noah Trasser of Dallas, TX, a Senior at the Cornell school of philosophy, turned in his thesis and announced that he has made definitive plans for after graduation. Trasser intends to emotionally prepare for being a 40 year old man playing basketball in the local JCC. “I was offered aContinue reading “College Senior Announces Plans to Become 40 Year Old Man Playing Basketball at the JCC After Graduation”

Bar Mitzvah Theme Makes Area Kid Seem Way More into Basketball than He Really Is

MIAMI, FL — When guests walked past the life-size cutout of LeBron James welcoming them to “Ryan’s Home Court” at the Hilton last Saturday night for Ryan Glazer’s bar mitzvah party, then passed under an arch made of basketball balloons and into a ballroom full of tables with centerpieces made of light up hoops whoseContinue reading “Bar Mitzvah Theme Makes Area Kid Seem Way More into Basketball than He Really Is”