Lactose Intolerant Ashkenaz Masochist Serves Third Cheesecake Of Shavuot

BOSTON, MA — On the second night of Shavuot, Jessica Gelman served yet another cheesecake for dessert, laughing with glee at the effect it would soon have on her lactose-intolerant family.  “I know there’s some kabbalistic meaning behind abstaining from meat on Shavuot, but to me, it’s just the one day a year I getContinue reading “Lactose Intolerant Ashkenaz Masochist Serves Third Cheesecake Of Shavuot”

Miracle Baby Born Without IBS

NEW YORK CITY, NY — Nothing short of a miracle took place at Manhattan’s Mount Sinai Hospital last night, where Melissa and Zev Pressman gave birth to an inexplicably IBS-free baby boy. The child appears to have been born without the rare intestinal disorder that causes abdominal pain and difficult bowel movements, common to JewsContinue reading “Miracle Baby Born Without IBS”

SHOCKING: Community Outraged by Rampant Ashkenormativity at Kugelfest

ALLENTOWN, PA — Allentown Jewish Community Center held their 38th Annual Kugelfest this Sunday at a park downtown; the day featured contests of over 75 kugel recipes, as well as strudel bake-offs, cholent eating contests, matzah ball workshops, and even a station where the kids could bob for gefilte fish in a bucket of borscht.Continue reading “SHOCKING: Community Outraged by Rampant Ashkenormativity at Kugelfest”