Rabbi Akiva’s 24,000 Students Didn’t Die So Jesus Could Take Credit For “Love Thy Neighbor As Thyself”

The famous Rabbi Akiva, known mainly for staring at water dripping on a rock, had one core principle that he discovered through a lifetime of Torah study and dedication to God: “Love thy neighbor as thyself.” But then some guy comes along, makes fish, passes the idea off as his own, and all of aContinue reading “Rabbi Akiva’s 24,000 Students Didn’t Die So Jesus Could Take Credit For “Love Thy Neighbor As Thyself””

Lactose Intolerant Ashkenaz Masochist Serves Third Cheesecake Of Shavuot

BOSTON, MA — On the second night of Shavuot, Jessica Gelman served yet another cheesecake for dessert, laughing with glee at the effect it would soon have on her lactose-intolerant family.  “I know there’s some kabbalistic meaning behind abstaining from meat on Shavuot, but to me, it’s just the one day a year I getContinue reading “Lactose Intolerant Ashkenaz Masochist Serves Third Cheesecake Of Shavuot”

Tragic: This Man Forgot to Count Omer Last Night

STAMFORD, CT — In an unfortunate lapse of memory, Stamford native Elie Sharansky forgot to count the Omer last night, missing what would have been the 47th and penultimate night before Shavuot.  Sharansky, who until last night had maintained a seven year perfect streak, was reminded of his error at a Shacharit minyan this morning.Continue reading “Tragic: This Man Forgot to Count Omer Last Night”