Tag Archives: kiddish

Tragic: Woman Digging Through Chulent For Chunk Of Beef Fooled By Meat-Like Potato

When shacharit is coming to a closeAnd all the men do stand and take their leaveTheir tallit wrapped around as snow-white robesThe kiddish club doth meet beneath the eaves They deign to miss the torah read out liveAnd Musaf p’raps shall not return to prayFor though they may be pushing thirty fiveThey need a shotContinue reading “Tragic: Woman Digging Through Chulent For Chunk Of Beef Fooled By Meat-Like Potato”

Recently Uncovered Challah Embarrassed To Find Out Bracha Made On Wine First

NEW ROCHELLE, NY — Despite the usage of an embroidered silk cover, a humiliated loaf of challah discovered last Saturday that before the HaMotzi blessing, a blessing had already been made on a cup of wine.  “I’ve always been told you’re supposed to make a bracha on bread first,” said the sobbing and lightly-toasted pretzelContinue reading “Recently Uncovered Challah Embarrassed To Find Out Bracha Made On Wine First”

Brawl Erupts in Mad Dash for Mini Hot Dogs at Bar Mitzvah Kiddush

HOLLYWOOD, FL — In a tragic turn of events, six Young Israel congregants were hospitalized in critical condition this week, all harmed in the same fistfight that broke out next to the mini hot dogs at Jakey Schultz’s bar mitzvah kiddish.  “At first I felt bad throwing punches at guys I’ve prayed next to forContinue reading “Brawl Erupts in Mad Dash for Mini Hot Dogs at Bar Mitzvah Kiddush”

SHOCKING: Community Outraged by Rampant Ashkenormativity at Kugelfest

ALLENTOWN, PA — Allentown Jewish Community Center held their 38th Annual Kugelfest this Sunday at a park downtown; the day featured contests of over 75 kugel recipes, as well as strudel bake-offs, cholent eating contests, matzah ball workshops, and even a station where the kids could bob for gefilte fish in a bucket of borscht.Continue reading “SHOCKING: Community Outraged by Rampant Ashkenormativity at Kugelfest”