Prospective Student at College Fair Way Too Worried About BDS on Campus, Considering He Probably Won’t Even Get In

ST LOUIS, MO — At Washington University in St. Louis’ prospective student visiting day on Sunday, high school senior Jason Wolman spent far too much time asking about the presence of anti-Zionist organization BDS on campus, for someone with very little chance of being accepted to the college in the first place.  “This stuff isContinue reading “Prospective Student at College Fair Way Too Worried About BDS on Campus, Considering He Probably Won’t Even Get In”

Instagram Activist Calls Out Non-Jewish Friends Who Posted for Earth Day and Not Tu Bishvat

HYDE PARK, IL — Avid social activist Julie Bloomfeld was shocked to see the slew of Earth Day posts on her non-Jewish friend’s Instagram stories, when not a single one of them said a word about Tu Bishvat only a few months ago. “Earth Day is basically just a knock-off Tu Bishvat,” said Bloomfeld. “IContinue reading “Instagram Activist Calls Out Non-Jewish Friends Who Posted for Earth Day and Not Tu Bishvat”

Confused Dominatrix Accidentally Attends Rally for BDS Movement

BERKELEY, CA — Clad in tight-fitting leather fetishwear, local dominatrix Susie Sanders told reporters that her attendance at a rally in support of the Boycott, Divestment and Sanctions movement that took place on the quad of UC Berkeley last Monday was unintentional.  “I came here to fuck,” said Sanders, who was looking to participate inContinue reading “Confused Dominatrix Accidentally Attends Rally for BDS Movement”