Breaking: Jewish Day Schools Just Hiring Strangers At El-Al Arrival Gate As Hebrew Teachers

QUEENS, NY — Following staffing shortages at Ramaz Upper School, the principal, Mr. Joshua Adelman, was seen Monday in John F. Kennedy International Airport Terminal 4 searching for potential Hebrew teachers arriving from an El-Al flight. “We’re looking for anyone that can speak the language, basically,” Adelman told reporters while hiding behind a large fernContinue reading “Breaking: Jewish Day Schools Just Hiring Strangers At El-Al Arrival Gate As Hebrew Teachers”

American Yeshiva Student With New Blundstones, Rav-Kav, Basically Israeli Now

JERUSALEM, IL — According to several witnesses waiting in line on Ben Yehuda Street for overpriced crépes, yeshiva student Yonah Gellman was spotted wearing brand-spanking-new Blundstones and carrying a freshly printed Rav Kav, indicating he’s basically Israeli now. Gellman, who is starting his third week at Yeshivat Eretz HaTzvi, is already considering renouncing his AmericanContinue reading “American Yeshiva Student With New Blundstones, Rav-Kav, Basically Israeli Now”

Quiz: Does the El Al Stewardess Hate You or Is She Just Israeli?

You’re getting on the plane, dreading a 12 hour flight. How does the stewardess make you feel better? A. She looks you directly in the eyes with a look of pure disdain before quickly shifting her gaze to the person behind you. B. She looks you up and down with a judgemental look but saysContinue reading “Quiz: Does the El Al Stewardess Hate You or Is She Just Israeli?”