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Frustrated Gabai’s Hand Signals Doing Most Of Work For Underprepared Bar Mitzvah Boy

CLEVELAND, OH — Despite the best efforts of Gabai Steve Ben-Yosef’s fervent hand signals, it was clear to everyone attending young Benny Haim’s Bar Mitzvah at Temple Beth Am this past weekend that Haim was underprepared to read his Torah portion. “After the runt stuttered and blubbered his way through the second Aliyah, I knewContinue reading “Frustrated Gabai’s Hand Signals Doing Most Of Work For Underprepared Bar Mitzvah Boy”

Baby in Back of Synagogue Must Like REALLY Hate Haman

SEATTLE, WA — Congregation Beth Shalom’s Emma Geller, the 4-month old daughter of Meital and Ben Geller, showed her admirably staunch disapproval of the evil Haman’s attempted genocide of our people Erev Purim, when she would not stop crying through literally the entire Megillah reading. Emma began crying as soon as Rabbi Eric Horowitz began readingContinue reading “Baby in Back of Synagogue Must Like REALLY Hate Haman”

SHOCKING: Bar Mitzvah Speech Makes Sense?

PORTLAND, OR — Congregants at Temple Or Shalom were shocked this morning when bar mitzvah boy Daniel Haber’s speech was both coherent and interesting. Earlier that morning, the 13-year-old Daniel stumbled through his maftir and haftorah readings, which were barely audible to the friends and family who had traveled from around the country to beContinue reading “SHOCKING: Bar Mitzvah Speech Makes Sense?”