Tag Archives: program

Sex, Murder, Matzah: White Lotus Season Three To Take Place At Passover Program

“What the entertainment industry has deemed ‘White Marror’ is set to come out in April 2024. The new season will take place at the Fountainbleu Miami hotel, and include Jewish actors such as Andy Samberg, Gal Gadot, and the ghost of Mel Brooks, as well as noted goy Jennifer Coolidge.”

Local Kid Won’t Stop Talking About NFTY, For Some Reason

CLEVELAND, OH — Classmates of local high school junior Jared Shuman continue to be shocked, annoyed, and almost impressed by the sheer amount of words that Shuman is able to say every single day about NFTY. Shuman, who serves as regional vice president of the Reform Jewish Youth Movement, has worn a different NFTY-related shirtContinue reading “Local Kid Won’t Stop Talking About NFTY, For Some Reason”

Only Eating Into Own Free Time: USY Participants Unaware Their Friends Worked Really Hard To Plan Program For Them

ATLANTA, GA – Local USY Director Andrew Zeff has had his hand raised for over 7 minutes now, waiting for high school youth group participants to quiet down and allow the two convention coordinators to continue with the program they had planned. “It should not have to take this long,” said Zeff to the 184Continue reading “Only Eating Into Own Free Time: USY Participants Unaware Their Friends Worked Really Hard To Plan Program For Them”

Finally: New BBYO Program Teaches Teens How To Be Followers

WASHINGTON D.C. — Leaders within the BBYO youth movement have recently announced plans for a new summer program called the International Followership Training Institute, which will take place at an assortment of JCC camps across the country. In a press release on Sunday, BBYO’s Director of Teen Programming Evan Barkin wrote, “For almost 100 years,Continue reading “Finally: New BBYO Program Teaches Teens How To Be Followers”

BREAKING: NCSY Reveals Shomer Negiah Fabricated To Prevent Shabbaton Hook Ups

BOCA RATON, FL  — Shockwaves rippled through the Jewish community this week when Josh Jacobs, the head of national youth group NCSY, admitted that the organization invented shomer negiah in the late 50’s as part of a joint effort with the Orthodox Union to stop high schoolers from engaging in physical acts on Shabbatons. ManyContinue reading “BREAKING: NCSY Reveals Shomer Negiah Fabricated To Prevent Shabbaton Hook Ups”

Zoom Hillel Doesn’t Hit Like it Used To

CHARLOTTESVILLE, VA — Students at the University of Virginia report that Hillel’s Zoom events just aren’t quite doing it for them anymore. Despite the student board’s ongoing attempts at creating engaging activities and services, members of the community feel it just isn’t quite right. “I don’t really feel like I have the time to logContinue reading “Zoom Hillel Doesn’t Hit Like it Used To”