HOLLYWOOD, FL — In a tragic turn of events, six Young Israel congregants were hospitalized in critical condition this week, all harmed in the same fistfight that broke out next to the mini hot dogs at Jakey Schultz’s bar mitzvah kiddish. “At first I felt bad throwing punches at guys I’ve prayed next to forContinue reading “Brawl Erupts in Mad Dash for Mini Hot Dogs at Bar Mitzvah Kiddush”
Tag Archives: israel
No Homo: We’re Just Chevrutas
I just have to make something absolutely clear: me and my new chevruta, the ever-so-brilliant Jacob Feinman, are just that – chevrutas. There’s no funny business going on whatsoever. Just two bros shteiging Shmuel Aleph. And sure, we just started perek 18 last Shabbos and we’re already up to perek 21, but that shouldn’t beContinue reading “No Homo: We’re Just Chevrutas”
Anti-Israel Liberal Begrudgingly Admits Kibbutz Only Example Of Communism Actually Working
BERKELEY, CA — In a heated political debate about forms of government that took place in the University of California, Berkeley dining hall this Thursday, left-leaning philosophy major Henry Blake reluctantly supported his pro-communism argument by citing the success of Israeli socialist communes known as Kibbutzim. “Listen, I’m definitely not the biggest fan of Israel,Continue reading “Anti-Israel Liberal Begrudgingly Admits Kibbutz Only Example Of Communism Actually Working”
Changing The Game: Visionary High Schooler Starts Tznius Fashion Instagram
TEANECK, NJ — It’s hard to believe that Bat Tzion Steinhardt, or as she’s known online, @btzn.modestfash, debuted her new modest fashion Instagram blog only a few days ago. Steinhardt is the newest in a long line of high schoolers, many now alumni, who have overcome the complex ins and outs of dress codes toContinue reading “Changing The Game: Visionary High Schooler Starts Tznius Fashion Instagram”
Brave Student Changes Phone To Military Time In Solidarity With Boyfriend In IDF
CHESTNUT HILL, MA — In a heroic show of support for her boyfriend fighting in the Israeli Defense Forces, Boston College freshman Monica Feldman changed her phone’s clock to 24-hour military time this past week. Feldman met her boyfriend Natan Bitton during her year studying in Israel. They dated for four months before Bitton enlistedContinue reading “Brave Student Changes Phone To Military Time In Solidarity With Boyfriend In IDF”
Inspiring: Ben & Jerry’s Releases New Partition Plan Flavor
Image via Ben and Jerry’s with modification
Only Eating Into Own Free Time: USY Participants Unaware Their Friends Worked Really Hard To Plan Program For Them
ATLANTA, GA – Local USY Director Andrew Zeff has had his hand raised for over 7 minutes now, waiting for high school youth group participants to quiet down and allow the two convention coordinators to continue with the program they had planned. “It should not have to take this long,” said Zeff to the 184Continue reading “Only Eating Into Own Free Time: USY Participants Unaware Their Friends Worked Really Hard To Plan Program For Them”
Quiz: Does the El Al Stewardess Hate You or Is She Just Israeli?
You’re getting on the plane, dreading a 12 hour flight. How does the stewardess make you feel better? A. She looks you directly in the eyes with a look of pure disdain before quickly shifting her gaze to the person behind you. B. She looks you up and down with a judgemental look but saysContinue reading “Quiz: Does the El Al Stewardess Hate You or Is She Just Israeli?”
Man Has Not Put On Tefillin Today, Despite What He Told Chabad Man On Street
WEST LAFAYETTE, IN — When local student Ezra Adler was asked by a bearded man, presumably of Chabad affiliation, if he had put on tefillin that day, it was the lie heard ‘round the world. Though laying phylacteries is traditional for Jewish men over the age of 13 to do every morning, Ezra had notContinue reading “Man Has Not Put On Tefillin Today, Despite What He Told Chabad Man On Street”
10 Athletes You’ll Be Super Proud To Know Are Jewish
As Jews, we aren’t exactly known for our superior sports skills. But, have there been at least 10 successful Jewish athletes throughout the history of humankind? Let’s find out! 1. Sandy KoufaxNJB alert! Koufax was a pitcher for the Brooklyn Dodgers and one of the best arms in baseball. But he chose not to pitchContinue reading “10 Athletes You’ll Be Super Proud To Know Are Jewish”
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